Is Google a Tiger?

Enough of your wheeling and dealings,

Your smiles and second hand feelings,

This week was extraordinarily bitter,

Twenty percent lose Google and Twitter,

With all of Trump’s tweets and words,

And his still wide eyed following herds,

Twitter has less users and so does Google,

Could it be the tiger is really a poodle?

xxx

Marc Antony

When Marc Antony spoke over Caesar’s cadaver,
After the Roman Senate’s extreme misbehavior,
He started by saying to his fellow Romans – please hear,
“Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ear”,
Then he went on to explain to the gathering mob,
That stabbing Caesar was part of the Senate’s job,
What baffles me about the Shakespearean scenario,
Did Marc Antony return the ear that he asked to borrow,
xxx

My grass is Greener

I saw the neighbor’s yard, outer and inner,
Indeed the grass there was noticeably greener,
The pool water too, was bluer as blue as the sea,
So, I sent our dogs to their pool to swim and to pee,
Now their grass is still green, but smells a bit funny,
Their pool looks like lemonade and makes your nose runny,
Let there be a lesson to each neighbor and nearby dweller,
My pool is always bluer and my grass forever greener,
xxx

Otzi the Iceman

Otzi the iceman, the Alps Mountains found mummy,

For years, researchers were checking his tummy,

They discovered just now, he was eating lamb and deer,

Followed quickly by a liter or two, of Canadian beer,

They also found seeds of different kind and type of plums,

Something that looked like burger cheese in sesame buns,

He also ate steak and bacon, and chicken, and types of cheese,

Hotdogs and marshmallows, his stomach hung down to his knees,

It was very clear to the research team right from the start,

That if not for the arrow, he would die of a blocked heart,

xxx

Parenthood

Adam and Eve, we are led to believe,

Were the first-born, without being conceived,

Adam was born from mud, muck, and clay,

Eve from his rib was born, almost without delay,

Both were running around naked, (no diapers),

Among the lions, hyenas, zebras and tigers,

Then they ate an apple, and behold they got smart,

Forced from the Garden of Eden to depart,

Dressed in the leaf of a fig to be covered,

Is it wonder their parents were never discovered?

xxx

Helsinki Meeting

July 16th – two thousand eighteen, today,
One day after the world cup final play,
In Helsinki, Finland, two are holding hands,
Putin of Russia and Trump of the United States,
At last, the two will look into each other’s eyes,
A hard look, checking each other for size,
Both want to show the world, his is bigger,
Both can most definitely qualify as a chigger,
I wonder if by the end of the day Trump will Tweet,
It was a great date, and Vladimir Putin is sweet,
xxx

Eat your cake

It is said you can’t have your cake and eat it too,

I look around and all I see is people that non-stop chew,

Someone got it all wrong, right from the start,

People eat cakes, pies, puff pastry and tart,

All is collecting around huge tummies and butts,

Accumulating pounds and calories into their guts

When next time you hear you can’t keep and eat your cake,

Laugh it off and help yourself to another flake,

xxx

Law or Theory

Why is gravity a law and evolution a theory?
Relativity and quantum are theories very clearly,
Why the difference why the distinction,
Anything to do with tradition or maybe religion?
How is it decided what is a law and what is theory?
Is it the name, Einstein or Darwin or Curie?
I really do not care if it is the Sorbonne or Yale,
But if I break a scientific law I am not going to jail,
xxx

Construction

Is it only me that pays attention,

But, whenever there is a new construction location,

Certain rules apply, in very specific order,

First, they put a fence to mark the border,

Then, signage is put up on the fence, a warning,

To watch out for things that may be falling,

And then without further ado and beforehand

They install the necessary mobile toilet stand

xxx

Moving backward real fast

Our values are changing, it is very clear,

What for centuries was loved and held dear,

Today takes backseat to vulgar, foolish and crude,

Now people value things that are foul, trite and rude,

Once we valued spiritual, witty, aesthetic, creative, artistic,

Today, mediocre, hate, bad taste and opportunistic,

Once:

A writer, a poet, composer, philosopher,

Were admired,

Today:

Coarse, unrefined, banal, trashy, and boorish,

Are required,

xxx

A car every seven minutes

I read in the daily paper, an interesting story,
Statistics I was not aware of, in the car category,
It seems every seven minutes a man buys a car,
A Honda, Toyota, Chrysler, a GM, ford or a Jaguar,
However, one thing baffles me so, and I wonder,
(And the suspense is driving me under),
With all this car buying, purchasing and acquiring,
Where in God’s name – does he find parking?

xxx

To B flat or not to B flat

So then, I said to Mozart – “Don’t B Flat”,

I know you can do it at the drop of a hat,

Have you considered a C Major for a change?

After all your orchestra does have the range,

Good idea said he, let me think about it a bit,

Without thinking, I admit I hate to commit,

Then he returned and said –“consider it done”,

I shall immediately write symphony # forty-one,

xxx

My Cheese

There is an amazing aroma today in the kitchen,
That keeps everyone in the house a’ bitchin,
My homemade cheese factory has struck oil,
I managed to make artisan cheese nothing was spoiled,
If you thought Brie, Munster or Roquefort smell,
My cheese makes you run like a bat out of hell,
Limburger is like perfume compared to my treat,
It reminds everyone the tangy smell of athlete’s feet,
xxx

Only one

I feel so ashamed, so out of place,

So much so, I cannot show my face,

I am the only one in town I confess,

Oh, what pressure, oh, what stress,

I look around and see I am the only one,

No one else like me under the sun,

Why only me, I have no real clue,

Why am I the only one without a tattoo?

Xxx

He gets no satisfaction

When Mick Jagger dances and sings,

Rock and roll and other music things,

When he jumps up and down and screams,

In his old dirty T-shirt and tight jeans,

As he says, he can get no satisfaction,

(A song that used to cause a chain reaction),

I ask could it possibly be his advanced age,

That put the man in such troubled rage,

Is it possible Mick gets no satisfaction?

Because he suffers from erectile dysfunction,

xxx

Myths

We have many ideas and myths we believe,

From Timbuktu city to good old Tel Aviv,

We follow them come fire or water, over years,

They are stuck in our heads, help overcome fears,

For example, Friday the 13th is thought very bad luck,

So is walking under a ladder, or getting hit by a puck,

But one should always consider both sides of the story,

Chicken soup is good for you, in the health category,

Really? Check with the chicken-

for her it was dreadful and bloody gory,

xxx

An end to another beginning

What can one say, another book done,

And I must admit, it was lots of fun,

Doodling and writing is a good combination,

Putting rhyme with the odd illustration,

Ideas flow, lines of words or ink or pencil,

No need for any other tool or utensil,

Page after page connected and joined,

Trying to make sense and offer a point,

xxx

Zombies

I have been doing some research on things,

About reasons and ideas, queens and kings,

Why does a cow’s udder have only four teats?

Why the lion devour meat and the zebra grass eats,

Sometimes I come with answers to such questions,

Sometimes I ponder and look for suggestions,

I look for the logical the coherent and rational,

Although I do try to avoid making it personal,

For example, I have an explanation to the Zombie situation,

(Better known nowadays as the Z nation),

It seems to me as clear as cream cheese ,bagel and lox,

Zombies walk around and exist –

Because they are required to think outside the box

xxx

Important issues

Many years ago, I have learned my lesson,
You will be smart, to hear me out and listen,
Everyone wants to save the world, overpopulation,
Stop climate change, genetic modification,
Cease earth warming, deforestation, pollution,
Ozone layer depletion, teenager prostitution,
Important issues, the future of our universe,
We write about it, we talk, in prose and verse,
These are our wants and our important wishes,
However, no one ever helps mother with the dishes,
xxx

Then and Now

Do you remember when we had the two dollars bills?

When the north of Toronto, ended with Steeles,

When Yonge Street was referred to as highway eleven,

And past the end of the world, we had highway seven,

When you drove on 400, you actually were moving,

Radio was 1050 CHUM, and on the AM dial we were grooving,

Pearson was the PM, not the International Airport,

Nobody knew liter and KM, all we had were mile and quart,

A gallon of gas was thirty cents at the pump,

Best of all down south we had a Kennedy not a Trump,

xxx

The state of my prostate

I have been wondering about the state of the prostate,

Since nowadays, one needs to wait if one wants to liquidate,

It gives you time to wonder and ponder and think,

How it used to be when you were peeing in a blink,

It is not as if everything else works like well-oiled machine,

What is now, is nothing like it has been,

Now one has to think and make up an excuse,

How and why one stained up his shoes,

xxx