And The Clock Runneth faster

If it’s Tuesday it must be Belgium,
If the balloon flies, it must be helium,
If it is very hot, it has to be summer,
The crack of his ass says: “I am the plumber”,
Telling the end of the movie, you just spoiled it,
If the clock says nine AM, you’re on the toilet,
Well, today the clock was late by a whole mile,
That explains why on the toilet floor we have a pile,