Toronto Subway

I know you’ll think I made it up and I lie,
To be so stupid your brain just had to die,
In Toronto we are building a new subway,
To take you across without too much delay,
Alas, city hall found subway stops are expensive,
Each stop will raise price and it is apprehensive,
So, city hall decided to cut the number of stops,
With each “less stop” the subway price really drops,
So instead of a train that will stop every station,
The train will go east-west-east in permanent fixation,
Thus we will have a subway that has no stops,
But the savings indeed are amazingly tops,
xxx

Relatives

My friend posted that Einstein had said,
That all is relative from toe tip to head,
I see no logic in such encompassing affirmation,
Unless like Hawking, you have a black hole fixation,
Where everything gets swallowed, not even a burp,
So I sent a message via twitter (a little chirp),
To my friend I had said ‘nuf’ with the science,
Too complicated I can’t even get to work a simple appliance,
All these high theories just give me a headache,
I can’t keep my eyes open I can’t stay awake,
Not everything is relative; I have only a few,
Only by marriage and these out the window flew,
So with the marriage also went the relatives,
The good thing is that with them so went the sedatives,
xox