First Time I cried

A few years ago late at night,
The first time since childhood that I cried,
It sounded scary like an animal wounded,
As a big hollowed bull being slaughtered,
It came out of my chest uncontrolled,
Forty years of pain was being unfold,
It rolled out as a big wave exploding,
As ache and frustration was unloading,
Choking and suffocating me to my core,
Reaping through leaving an open sore,
You just stood there not comprehending,
Neither grasping nor understanding,
As another column was coming down,
Another support pillar was about to drown,
Another layer buried deep under,
Another coat was going sunder,
Since then it has been peeling away,
Without proper care coating does not stay,
Until exposed the flesh naked remains,
Exposing bone, sinew and veins,
You think you know and understand,
Fact is you never could apprehend,
Since no one held on like a “mensch”,
All that remains is a big stench,
xox
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